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I remember being 12 years old the first time I stood in front of the mirror and eyed myself with disgust. My friends at the time were all early bloomers and as their bodies developed I began to be teased over the fact that I still wasn't wearing a bra or had yet to begin my menstrual cycle.
I would come home and pick myself over with a fine toothed comb. I would magnify each imperfection and dwell and silently pray that one day this would come to an end and I would be able to stare eye to eye with my bullies.
The scene repeated itself as I grew older. Each time something improved I found more to see wrong in myself. In the spring of 2008, I was age 22. Slightly older, but not much wiser I stood in front of the mirror once again. I recall being particularly out of patience with the zig-zags of stretch marks along my thighs and rear-- scars left behind from my yo-yo dieting in high school. Something must have been in the air because instead of reaching for a towel to cover up I grabbed my camera.
I began a series of photographs that highlighted these imperfections. My set up was amateur to say the least, my camera wobbled atop a tissue box and an old desk lamp lit my way to self discovery. The pictures produced introduced me to a new person, someone the mirror had failed to show me. As I stared at the captured images, each imperfection became a work of art before my eyes.
Since this experience the focus of my photography has turned to conceptual self portraiture. Besides helping me cope with my body image issues, my work tells stories of loneliness, rejection, thoughts on marriage and motherhood, sexuality, and the expectations society has placed on the female form. This type of photography has helped me handle many of my personal issues and pain caused by inner battles. Drawing inspiration from avante-garde film makers like Maya Deren and Willard Maas, surrealist painter Frida Kahlo, and fellow photographer Cindy Sherman I continue this line of work in hope that other women will find a voice in my visuals and feel more at peace knowing that we are in this journey together.
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Bio